There are about 587,485,748 cat toys in this house. But do you think my cats want to play with a single one? Of course not! No, instead they play with everything else that is not intended for them. The more off-limits, the better. And they seem to know which things are the most precious to me.
"Mom's ring is on the table... It's pretty close to the edge. I know she loves that ring, but... it's so shiny!" *swipes the ring*
"Oooh... something in Mom's purse makes a cool rattling noise. Let me just check this out..." *pulls objects out of purse one by one* "Aha! Here it is. She takes these pills every day.. so they must be important... but it sounds so fun!" *bats around pill bottle*
And then the one time they want to play with an actual cat toy, it happens to be the one shoved way under the couch. It could be completely identical to the one sitting in the middle of the floor in plain view, but no... he has to have the one under the couch. So I dig the toy out, throw it for him to chase, and watch him play with it for all of two minutes before he's either bored or loses it somewhere else.
You'd think we'd learn our lesson by now. Quit wasting money on cat toys! But everytime we go grocery shopping, we end up standing in front of the cat toys for a good five minues or so, until we finally decide "No, those cats are assholes! They don't deserve a new toy." And then we just bombard them with new toys at Christmas.
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
A little background...
The other day I jokingly told my boyfriend (Ryan) that I should start a blog about all of the obnoxious things our cats do. Today I woke up to find my purse spilled out on the floor. I texted Ryan:
Me: Um did u dump my purse out?
Ryan: Lol. No. Is there fur on the scene of the crime?
And so begins my blog about my asshole cats.
Ryan and I live together in Ann Arbor, MI. I have lived with him for two and a half years. Ryan has a cat named Samuel L. Jackson. We usually call him Sammy Sam. When I first moved in, I left my cat, Frodo, to live at my dad's house, because we weren't sure if he would get along with Sammy Sam. Of course I missed Frodo terribly, and cried every once in a while. Ryan felt bad. So six months later (as a sort of Christmas gift, I suppose) he told me that I could bring Frodo here, and if all went well, Frodo could stay. I was ecstatic and nervous... because here's the thing. Frodo is kind of an asshole.
Don't get me wrong, I love Frodo to death. He is my little bean! I have had him for almost nine years, now. We have been through a lot together. He has always been "my cat." When I went away for school and had to leave him at my mom's house (ages ago) he never forgot me. Every time I went home to visit, he lovingly would piss on all of my stuff in an attempt to get me to stay. Over the years, Frodo has lived in six different homes, having to share his space (and mama) with nine different cats and one dog. You'd think he'd be used to it by now, right? Wrong!
So we moved Frodo in... and things did not go well at all! The first night that both cats had free roam of the house, I woke up to an epic battle in our bed. The cats were alright, but I walked away soaked in cat piss and with a nasty gash on my hand. Eventually things calmed down a bit... but Frodo still does not like Sammy Sam. Sammy Sam, on the other hand, is a huge lover! Every once in a while he sneaks some kisses on Frodo's head. Frodo just stares at him with disgust. But I think he is finally starting to understand that if he chases Sammy Sam down and tries to kill him, mama's gonna shoot him with that terrifying laser pointer that doubles as a gun! (don't worry, it's just a nerf gun)
Anyway, this is getting long-winded, so I will save the rest for another entry... But I should say one more thing. Even though my cats are little assholes, they are my babies and I wouldn't trade them for the world!
-Rachel
Me: Um did u dump my purse out?
Ryan: Lol. No. Is there fur on the scene of the crime?
And so begins my blog about my asshole cats.
Ryan and I live together in Ann Arbor, MI. I have lived with him for two and a half years. Ryan has a cat named Samuel L. Jackson. We usually call him Sammy Sam. When I first moved in, I left my cat, Frodo, to live at my dad's house, because we weren't sure if he would get along with Sammy Sam. Of course I missed Frodo terribly, and cried every once in a while. Ryan felt bad. So six months later (as a sort of Christmas gift, I suppose) he told me that I could bring Frodo here, and if all went well, Frodo could stay. I was ecstatic and nervous... because here's the thing. Frodo is kind of an asshole.
Don't get me wrong, I love Frodo to death. He is my little bean! I have had him for almost nine years, now. We have been through a lot together. He has always been "my cat." When I went away for school and had to leave him at my mom's house (ages ago) he never forgot me. Every time I went home to visit, he lovingly would piss on all of my stuff in an attempt to get me to stay. Over the years, Frodo has lived in six different homes, having to share his space (and mama) with nine different cats and one dog. You'd think he'd be used to it by now, right? Wrong!
So we moved Frodo in... and things did not go well at all! The first night that both cats had free roam of the house, I woke up to an epic battle in our bed. The cats were alright, but I walked away soaked in cat piss and with a nasty gash on my hand. Eventually things calmed down a bit... but Frodo still does not like Sammy Sam. Sammy Sam, on the other hand, is a huge lover! Every once in a while he sneaks some kisses on Frodo's head. Frodo just stares at him with disgust. But I think he is finally starting to understand that if he chases Sammy Sam down and tries to kill him, mama's gonna shoot him with that terrifying laser pointer that doubles as a gun! (don't worry, it's just a nerf gun)
Anyway, this is getting long-winded, so I will save the rest for another entry... But I should say one more thing. Even though my cats are little assholes, they are my babies and I wouldn't trade them for the world!
-Rachel
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