The other day I jokingly told my boyfriend (Ryan) that I should start a blog about all of the obnoxious things our cats do. Today I woke up to find my purse spilled out on the floor. I texted Ryan:
Me: Um did u dump my purse out?
Ryan: Lol. No. Is there fur on the scene of the crime?
And so begins my blog about my asshole cats.
Ryan and I live together in Ann Arbor, MI. I have lived with him for two and a half years. Ryan has a cat named Samuel L. Jackson. We usually call him Sammy Sam. When I first moved in, I left my cat, Frodo, to live at my dad's house, because we weren't sure if he would get along with Sammy Sam. Of course I missed Frodo terribly, and cried every once in a while. Ryan felt bad. So six months later (as a sort of Christmas gift, I suppose) he told me that I could bring Frodo here, and if all went well, Frodo could stay. I was ecstatic and nervous... because here's the thing. Frodo is kind of an asshole.
Don't get me wrong, I love Frodo to death. He is my little bean! I have had him for almost nine years, now. We have been through a lot together. He has always been "my cat." When I went away for school and had to leave him at my mom's house (ages ago) he never forgot me. Every time I went home to visit, he lovingly would piss on all of my stuff in an attempt to get me to stay. Over the years, Frodo has lived in six different homes, having to share his space (and mama) with nine different cats and one dog. You'd think he'd be used to it by now, right? Wrong!
So we moved Frodo in... and things did not go well at all! The first night that both cats had free roam of the house, I woke up to an epic battle in our bed. The cats were alright, but I walked away soaked in cat piss and with a nasty gash on my hand. Eventually things calmed down a bit... but Frodo still does not like Sammy Sam. Sammy Sam, on the other hand, is a huge lover! Every once in a while he sneaks some kisses on Frodo's head. Frodo just stares at him with disgust. But I think he is finally starting to understand that if he chases Sammy Sam down and tries to kill him, mama's gonna shoot him with that terrifying laser pointer that doubles as a gun! (don't worry, it's just a nerf gun)
Anyway, this is getting long-winded, so I will save the rest for another entry... But I should say one more thing. Even though my cats are little assholes, they are my babies and I wouldn't trade them for the world!
-Rachel
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